Another Duh Moment

Well, it's happened twice in two days: headlines that really don't surprise me. I can't quite decide which of the two is more obvious. Is it the news piece about how cats control us? Or could it be the bit about how swearing makes us feel better?

Let's start with cats. Cat's use a specialized meow/purr combo to control us. I can tell you, from my vast cat/human interactive experiences, that it's not just the meow/purr that gets us moving. My cats control me in the kitchen just by sitting and staring at me. That's it. That's all they have to do. I go in the kitchen to fix food. Cat walks in. Cat sits. Cat looks up at me. I see cat looking at me and respond with food. It's that simple. Pay me now for my valuable insight, please!

As for swearing? Well #*!## yeah it makes you feel better! According to what I read some researchers took it upon themselves to study swearing and pain. I'd like to see a video of that experiment.

"Hey Bob! I want you to say the first thing that comes to mind when I smash your thumb with this hammer..."

It seems swearing triggers our 'fight or flight' response, which in turn increases our pain tolerance. When Bob's thumb gets hammered, bad language spews forth from his emotional right brain rather than the language producing left brain. Huh. What do you know. I can just imagine what sort of people these researchers are.

Interestingly, the researcher and his colleagues also made a connection between swearing and aggression. Well, yeah! Hurt me to study my swearing response and I'll get aggressive too!

You know, I could have combined both topics in one bit of research. Cat scratches/bites human. Human swears. Cat gets fed. Everybody feels better.

So, where do I sign up for a research grant?