Saturday, January 10, 2009

How to Resuscitate a Lizard

Several years ago (well, actually it was about 20 years ago...ahem!) I was working in an office cubicle in California. I used to post all kinds of things on my padded walls for the amusement of myself and my fellow workers. Today, as I was going through a box of junk important documents, I came across the image you see to the right. I believe my dad got this most helpful sign from a pool supply company in Phoenix and then I got a copy of it from him. I colored it in (never too old for coloring, I always say) and immediately posted it where everyone passing my cubie could see it. This became one of my more popular 'posts'. The print is tiny so I've reproduced these very important steps for you below - in case you ever have a drowning lizard emergency.

1. Scoop lizard from pool.

2. Shake out lizard.

3. Massage lizard's torso, applying on and off pressure, directly behind frontal legs.

4. Apply mouth to mouth resuscitation to lizard's mouth, breathing slowly and forcefully.

If you're squeamish about human to lizard mouth-breathing you could blow up a balloon, put it over the lizard's mouth and release the balloon air into the lizard. Just a thought. You know, in case lizard's carry salmonella . . . .

13 comments:

happyian said...

That should be mandatory in the schools.

Hahhahhh

oh man I can't get over how awesome that is...

Significant Snail said...

happy: I know, right? Maybe I should post this in my current office...

ElderSisLizardAstronomer said...

Um... I know what kind of office you work in; would resuscitating a lizard be a professional courtesy?

bwahahaha!!

esa said...

By the way, I just tweeted your entry to all my friends on Twitter. ;)

Significant Snail said...

esa: professional courtesy..yeah, that's the ticket...

you tweeted me on your twitter??!! um...ok?

LUCKY said...

Ah french lizardos as grandpa called them,they were fun to chase across the yard!!

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Wait, is this thing serious? It's almost hard to tell. It sound so sincere! Interesting that one would happen on your blog today to find snails and lizards all over the place. Kinda gives me the heebie jeebies!

tiff said...

I love PSAs like this. They make me feel smart. :)

BSH ADMIN said...

I would really love this made into a tee-shirt.

LUCKY said...

a

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

I second LUCKY's comment and would like to add a "b".

LUCKY said...

c

Robert said...

I have a copy of the exact same drawing that must be about 10 years older than yours. The text is the same, but a different font. Mine lacks the cross at the top. Across the bottom it reads "Form M-15 National Lizard League." I picked mine up in the SF Bay Area, though I've forgotten the exact source. At the time, many things came from my dad.

I liked your coloration. Nice to see another example.